6 Myths About Therapy That Might Be Keeping You From Reaching Out
Have you ever thought about going to therapy but talked yourself out of it? Maybe you think you should be able to handle things on your own. Maybe you're worried you'll spend every session talking about your childhood, or you aren't sure therapy can help because you don't really know what's wrong.
There are a lot of misconceptions about therapy that can keep people from reaching out for support. And sometimes, those beliefs make it harder to get the help we need. Let's look at six common myths about therapy and what you might want to know instead.
If you're considering therapy in Fort Collins, CO, I want to help clear up some of the myths that might be keeping you from taking that first step.
Myth #1: Therapy is only for people with a serious mental illness.
This myth contributes to the stigma surrounding mental health and can keep people from reaching out for support. The truth is that therapy is for much more than treating mental illness.
People choose to work with a therapist for all kinds of reasons, and many are functioning well in their everyday lives. They go to work, care for their families, maintain relationships, and keep up with their responsibilities. But that doesn't mean they aren't struggling beneath the surface.
Some of the things that bring people to therapy include:
Anxiety, depression, or chronic stress
Shame and self-criticism
Relationship challenges and recurring relationship patterns
Learning to set boundaries and communicate needs
Changes in identity and the challenges of mid-life
Processing distressing experiences, such as car accidents or house fires
Family estrangement and complicated family relationships
You don't need a mental health diagnosis, or to reach a breaking point, to benefit from therapy. Sometimes, it's enough to recognize that something in your life isn't working the way you'd like it to and that you'd like support in making a change.
Myth #2: Therapy is where I talk about my childhood every week.
Not all therapy focuses on childhood experiences. Many approaches focus on the challenges you're experiencing right now, whether that's anxiety, relationship difficulties, setting boundaries, or navigating changes in your life.
You can absolutely communicate with your therapist about what you'd like to focus on. Therapy should be a collaborative process, and you should have a voice in what you explore.
At the same time, some of the relationship patterns and coping strategies that affect us today can develop in childhood. Understanding where those patterns came from can help you recognize when they're showing up in your present life and begin to respond differently.
The goal isn't to spend every session talking about the past. It's to understand yourself more fully so you can make meaningful changes in the present. Sometimes that means focusing on what's happening in your life right now. Other times, looking back can help you understand what's getting in the way of moving forward.
Myth #3: Therapists just tell you what to do or fix your problems for you.
It can be really hard to navigate life when you're not sure what the “right answer” is. Making a choice means taking a risk, and that uncertainty can bring up all kinds of anxiety. Sometimes, it's tempting to look to someone else to tell us what to do so we don't have to sit with that uncertainty.
But therapy isn't about giving you all the answers. It's about helping you learn to problem-solve in ways that align with your own beliefs and values. It's also about helping you cope with the anxiety that comes with making a decision and finding the confidence to follow through.
Think about how it feels when a friend gives you advice and you follow it, only to have things turn out differently than you'd hoped. Even well-intentioned advice can't guarantee a good outcome. And when you're the one making the decision, you're the one who gets to decide what feels right for you and what you want to do next.
The same is true in therapy. Your therapist can offer perspective, help you recognize patterns, and support you as you consider your options. Therapy offers an opportunity to better understand yourself and develop a stronger sense of trust in your own choices.
P.S. This applies to AI chatbot advice, too! Getting an answer is not the same as learning to navigate uncertainty, understand yourself, and make choices that reflect who you are.
Myth #4: I already know why I feel this way, so therapy won’t help.
Having an intellectual understanding of why you do something doesn't necessarily lead to change.
This myth reminds me of a conversation between Rebecca and Ted in the first season of Ted Lasso. I kind of cringed at that scene. Rebecca understood that her fear of vulnerability was getting in the way of pursuing a new relationship, but knowing that didn't automatically make it easier for her to take the risk.
Understanding your patterns is important. But sometimes, it can also become a way of keeping difficult emotions at a distance. Intellectualizing can protect us from the vulnerability of actually feeling what we're trying so hard to understand.
If you're looking to improve your relationships, work through shame, or experience less anxiety, understanding your patterns is only part of the process. Learning to connect with your emotions, tolerate vulnerability, and experience something different in relationship with another person can be part of what helps change happen.
Therapy isn't just about understanding why you feel the way you do. It's also about creating the conditions for something to change.
Myth #5: If I can’t explain what’s wrong, therapy won’t work.
Not knowing what's wrong can make it hard to ask for help. It can feel intimidating to try to describe the indescribable, and that makes sense! Sometimes you just know something feels off, but you can't quite put it into words.
Maybe you're overthinking everything, feeling disconnected from yourself, or noticing the same difficulties in your relationships. You may not know whether what you're experiencing is anxiety, the effects of past experiences, or something else entirely. Therapy can help you figure it out. I often tell potential clients that you don't have to have it all figured out. You just have to reach out.
I stand by that. It's an honor to help you figure it out!
Myth #6: Therapy should fix me quickly.
We're human, and part of being human is that we all suffer at times. A deep cut can be stitched up by a doctor, but emotional wounds aren't quite so simple.
There are times I wish I could stitch up an emotional wound for a client and make life a little easier. That wish comes from knowing what it's like to suffer.
The path toward healing takes time, self-compassion, acceptance, and sometimes forgiveness. For many of us, these can be difficult things to put into practice, especially when we're hurting.
Change takes time. Therapy isn't about forcing yourself to move on or expecting every difficult feeling to disappear. It's about having support as you learn to understand your experiences, respond to yourself with more compassion, and find new ways of relating to yourself and others.
Therapy can't make all the pain disappear overnight. But you don't have to navigate it alone. Sometimes, healing begins in a relationship where you feel safe enough to understand your pain, reconnect with yourself, and find a different way forward. And that, I believe, is what therapy is all about.
Looking for therapy in Fort Collins, CO? You don't have to have it all figured out.
Maybe you've been trying to work through things on your own. Maybe you understand why you feel the way you do, but you're still struggling to make a change. Or maybe you just know something doesn't feel right, and you're not sure where to start.
You don't have to wait until things get worse, and you don't need to have all the answers before reaching out. Therapy can be a place to feel understood, make sense of what's happening, and begin finding a different way forward.
If you're ready to explore what therapy could look like for you, I'd be honored to walk alongside you.
Reach out today to get started.
About the Author
Megan Silberhorn, LPCC is a therapist and owner of Megan Silberhorn Counseling in Fort Collins, and online in Colorado. She specializes in anxiety, complex trauma, attachment, and supporting women through the emotional and physical challenges of mid-life and perimenopause. If you're ready to stop white-knuckling it alone, she'd love to hear from you.